Interview with Brit +Co Magazine
Communication is key to keeping your relationship strong, whether you've just had your first date or you're considering marriage. Knowing your love language helps, but so can asking the right questions to understand how your partner changes and evolves over time.
“We call it relating, not a relationship,” says Ben Anyasodo, a licensed behavioural change expert who founded the Black matchmaking service Chotayah with his wife Chiddie Anyasodo, an engineer and successful matchmaker. “Relating is, how am I relating to this person here right now? Am I relating respectfully? Is she feeling safe right now? Is she feeling loved? Does she feel like she matters? Is she feeling important now? Am I giving her dignity, regardless of how I feel? Because feelings are not facts, right? They are feelings. So, can I recognise that my feelings are my feelings and this person is this person?”
Ben and Chiddie chatted with us about the stages of relationships and how to get more out of yours at every stage. Here’s what they had to say, plus questions you can ask your (future) partner as you continue to get to know each other over time...